Barbie Joke

A while back when Rich's parents were in town we were telling them about the stereotype barbie joke and they wanted to see it. So hear it is. I hope you all enjoy.

Mattel recently announced the release of limited-edition Barbie Dolls for the Utah market:

' Park City Barbie'
She comes with an assortment of Kate Spade Handbags, a Lexus SUV, a long-haired foreign dog named Honey and a million dollar home. Available with or without tummy tuck and face lift. Workaholic Ken sold only in conjunction with the augmented version.
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' Sandy or Draper Barbie'
The modern day homemaker Barbie is available with Ford Wind star Minivan and matching gym outfit. She gets lost easily and has no full-time occupation. Traffic jamming cell phone sold separately.
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' Ogden Barbie'
This recently paroled Barbie comes with a 9mm handgun, a Ray Lewis knife, a Chevy with dark tinted windows, and a meth Lab Kit. This model is only available after dark and must be paid for in cash (preferably small, untraceable bills) unless you are a cop, then we don't know what you are talking about.
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' East Bench or St. George Barbie'
This yuppie Barbie comes with your choice of BMW convertible or Hummer H2. Included are her own Starbucks cup, credit card and country club membership. Also available for this set are Shallow Ken and Private School Skipper. You won't be able to afford any of them...
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' Spanish Fork Barbie'
This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans two sizes too small, a NASCAR t-shirt and tweedy bird tattoo on her shoulder. She has a six-pack of Bud light and a Hank Williams Jr. CD set. She can spit over 5 feet and kick mullet-haired Ken's butt when she is drunk. Purchase her pickup truck separately and get a confederate flag bumper sticker absolutely free.
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' Tooele Barbie'
This tobacco-chewing, brassy-haired Barbie has a pair of her own high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased beer-gutted Ken out of Spanish Fork Barbie's house. Her ensemble includes low-rise acid-washed jeans, fake fingernails, and a see-through halter-top. Also available with a mobile home.
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' Avenues or Moab Barbie'
This doll is made of actual tofu. She has long straight brown hair, arch-less feet, hairy armpits, no makeup and Birkenstocks with white socks. She prefers that you call her Willow. She does not want or need a Ken doll, but if you purchase two Moab Barbie's and the optional Subaru wagon, you get a rainbow flag bumper sticker for free.
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' West Valley Barbie'
This Barbie now comes with a stroller and 2 infant dolls. Optional accessories include a GED and bus pass. White boy Gangsta Ken and his 1979 Caddy were available, but are now very difficult to find since the addition of the infant.

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' Provo / BYU Barbie'
She's perfect in every way, mainly due to the high levels of antidepressants in her system. We don't know where Ken is because he's always at church meetings.

Travels back East

I have not posted anything for a while so I feel like I am so behind on blogging. I thought I would post some pictures from our trip back in WVA. We were able to visit my family and Rich was able to have a little break in between semesters for about 10 days in April.A veteran in Petersburg, WVA has collected war items, cars and artifacts over the last few decades and decided to display his items into a museum located outside of his house. I thought this was a cool way to retire, he was a nice old man.

I was amazed at how many army jeeps, tanks and war vehicles this man had. How he was able to get them to his house in small town Petersburg is amazing.
Robbie and Rich are standing in front of Robert E. Lee wooden table. We thought it was appropriate since Robert E. Lee is one of Rich's favorite generals and Robbie is somewhat named after him. He came across this table on accident through a garage sale and it happened to be the exact table from a museum that shut down with old civil war artifacts.
Rich and I did a little hiking up in the Dolly Sods which is a vast National Forest discovered by a German family way back when. We were hoping to see some of the wild flowers, but spring hasn't quite blossomed yet.
Rich leading the way through the muddy trail. Dolly Sods is known to have a lot of black bears so I am glad that we didn't run into any.

Robbie became obsessed with the old swing set outside of my grandma's home. He always wanted to swing a few times before going in to visit.
Rich and Robbie hanging out in the creek that runs through part of my grandparents land.
The creek is the first thing you see when you cross the wood bridge to get to my mom's house. Robbie had fun splashing around in it. One of his shoes fell off and we couldn't catch it in time. I didn't want to dive after it with the camera in my hand. Oh well, it least they were cheap used shoes.
Rich and I at Harpers Ferry. Harpers Ferry is located between Maryland and Virginia. It was a great connecting point for trading merchandise back in the day. Boats and trains were constantly bringing in goods before and after the civil war. Lewis and Clark even stopped in Harpers Ferry to load up on supplies before heading out West to explore.
One view of Harpers Ferry over the bridge. I wish we could have spent more time here. It was one of the coolest colonial towns I have ever been too. If you want some more fabulous views of Harpers Ferry check out this website. http://www.jimkirbyphoto.com/#a=0&at=0&mi=2&pt=1&pi=10000&s=0&p=3
Rich standing in front of the mason monument recognizing George Washington and the soldiers effort during the revolutionary war. Valley Forge is a very big park. Rich and I walked appx. 8 miles around the park just looking at all of the different historical sites. Lots of runners and bikers go there to exercise.
Here are some of the first log cabins built by the soldiers to keep them warm during the dreary winter months.
My sister Hylee and I standing over Queen's point where you can see the valley of which the town of Keyser is nestled in. My sister has a phobia of heights so I was really proud of her for standing by me this close to the edge. Although she was freaking out the whole time.
My friend Stephanie and I have been friends since we were beehives. She has a twin Jenny whom we met up with later that night for pizza and wings.
Rich really wanted to stop by this car to take a picture. He thought is was so funny that this rusty old car was growing plants out of the engine just sitting in the middle of nowhere.
This was one of the first iron stoves built in the 1800s to burn coal to use for heating and what not. It is located at one of the parks outside of Keyser, Rich and I thought it was a cool invention back in the day.
My sister Hylee won employee of the quarter at Maron Manor as a CNA. She was really surprised to see all of us at her work when they had a little party celebration for her.
Robbie loved one of this pug puppy that belonged to one of the Senior resident at Maran Manor. Unfortunately the dog was a little to old to keep up with Robbie, but he loved petting it anyway.

One morning Rich woke up early and took some photo shots of part on my grandparents farmland. Every morning when we walked outside we would see the sheep grazing and the hills were overcast for the first part of the week. I am glad that we got to go back one more time before Robbie turns two. Hopefully, we will still be able to afford to fly back East as our family grows.